[BNP/E3, 49A3 – 3]

29/V/12

We never joy enjoy to that full point

Regret doth wish joy had enjoyed been:

Doth present joy’s presence it sense disjoint[1]

Or regret’s farness joy’s small truth unmean?[2]

Whichever way truth writes, we sorrow read;[3]

{…}[4]

Perchance joy’s bodied and material deed[5]

When pure[6] by distance is joy’s |mere| soul turned.

However much we scheme with us to find[7]

Some name of joy for pain’s distance-deed[8]

We are blind leaders of our {…} blind[9]

Regret’s pain with the joy in which ’t doth feed,

So is ’t with regret as ‘tis with hope

Our eyes ache back, our hands forward grope[10]

 
[1] disjoint /(anoint)\
[2] joy’s small truth unmean? /joy’s pale worth dreams screen?\
[3] Whichever way truth writes, we sorrow read; /Haply joy’s grossness of immediate essence\
[4] {…} /Only by pain is out of grossness burned\
[5] deed /presence\
[6] pure /dead\
[7] find /grind\ /blind\
[8] for pain’s distance-deed /from pain’s illusion-need,\ /actual pain’s dream-need\ /Some past-joy’s name from /for\ actual pain’s dream/lie\-need\
[9] We are blind leaders of our {…} blind /We suffer by the joy our schemes do find.\
[10] Our eyes ache /glance aches\ back, our /ached\ hands forward grope /One joy is regret’s pain, the other vain hope.\ /One joy is pain-regret; one empty-/nothing-\hope\